Saying Goodbye to Hannah's Hope

Friday, June 1st - Saying goodbye to Hannah’s Hope


This morning Kewogo woke up well rested and obviously feeling much better. We concluded that yesterday’s illness was perhaps due to motion sickness due from the long van ride to the embassy. In fact, she is feeling so much better that today has been one of our best days with her yet. After breakfast we went outside to play and she was on fire just laughing, running and being silly. We went into the conference room at the hotel and we played hide and seek (she is a master at this!) and I taught her some gymnastics and yoga. We definitely seem to have quite the sporty little girl. We had one of our best play times yet. We have seen her show grieving behavior a couple of times a day. She will all of a sudden get very quiet and we simply hold her and sing to her and then she falls asleep. We were told that her grieving would show itself in the form of ‘tantrum throwing’ or sleeping and so far it seems sleeping is the way she processes grief. She doesn’t stay asleep for long and she soon becomes playful again.

We were picked around noon to say our goodbyes at Hannah’s Hope and pick up her visa. She kept saying that she did not want to go to HH and when we pulled up she got a concerned look on her face. I think she thought that we were taking her back there. We kept saying, “We have to say Ciao, Almaz.” (Almaz is the director of HH. She seemed secure in this and went through the gates with no problem.) She immediately saw some of her special mothers and ran up to hug them. They beamed when they saw her and kept talking to her a mile a minute. The older kids were at school and the younger ones were eating lunch so she sat down and ate with them. The special mothers doted on her and stayed right by her side. I can imagine how hard it is for them to watch the children they have loved for so long leave. Almaz then went over a few last things with Matt and me. As she was finishing up the older children came running in the door and ran over to the three of us and began hugging and kissing us. I truly think my heart melted at that moment. It was so amazing to watch them love on Kewogo as they know it is her last day. After the kids and Matt left the room Almaz said the last thing she wanted to talk to us about was how to take care of Kewogo’s hair. I love this!!! I expected it to be something attachment related but no, it was all about hair! She told us what to expect from Kewogo’s hair and how it would grow and things she will probably like to do with it in the future. It was awesome. Almaz says that she knows how important hair is in the US and that as she grows she probably won’t like her short hair very much (her hair won’t get very long at all). It will definitely be a learning experience for all of us and I appreciated that Almaz gave it such serious attention.

It was then time to wrap up our goodbyes. First we said goodbye to the older children as they were heading back to school. Luckily this went quickly because my heart couldn’t have taken anything longer. It is amazing how these children have become such a part of our lives and we will never forget them or the affect they have had on us. Next, we made the rounds at HH and made sure Kewogo was able to say goodbye to all of her special mothers. One mother in particular held her for a long time and talked and talked to her. I was having the hardest time trying to fight back tears as I knew she was speaking only words of love to her. I was amazed as we watched Kewogo make the rounds and show strength in her goodbyes as we knew it was most likely difficult for her despite her excitement of going home with us on a plane. Once we felt that she had experienced all of her goodbyes and showed us she was ready to go we got in the van for our final trip back to the hotel. When we retuned we went in and ate lunch and Kewogo was in rare form. If she was sad she didn’t show it. She loves to play tricks on us and blame the other one. She also put on my sunglasses, stuck her hands in her pockets and pretended to strut as if she was walking down a fashion runway. Yes, this child will fit in perfectly with our family!

Then it was back up to the room to Skype with the kids before school. She loves hearing their voices and had fun calling out their names. I just have to interject one parental bragging moment. So yesterday Matt and I had sent Andrew a message telling him good luck at his baseball game and I told him to get some hits. He told me he would get some hits for Kewogo. Well, he did just that! One home run, a triple, and a single! Sorry to brag but it was his first home run ever and I thought it was pretty cool that he said he would do it for her. Next, the three of us took a nap and I began packing. We are sooo ready to begin our journey home! Last time we left here I was so sad to be leaving her behind and this time I am bursting at the seams to get home to our family so the kids can meet her and we can begin experiencing our new family life. When I look at this sweet child and the more we get to know her there Is NO doubt that God had chosen her specifically to be with our family. It was His plan all along and I cannot stop praising Him for taking a tragic situation and using it for good and for His glory. I know that there will be many rough days ahead as we move forward but I feel secure in the knowledge that we won’t have to go it alone as God has been present through every step of the way.

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, and who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28-29