2 years now

It was 2 years ago that I mailed off our adoption application to AGCI. We definitely thought that we would have been further along in this process by now, but all we can do is take one day at a time and live in the hope for what tomorrow may bring. A couple of weeks ago we had a very emotional week as a result of some issues that arose. I had already entered the week weary from some separate events that had taken place over the weekend. When I sat down on a Monday morning to read through my devotion book with Andrew before he got on the bus, this is what I read..........

I am with you and for you. When you decide on a course of action that is in line with My will, nothing in heaven or earth can stop you. You may encounter many obstacles as you move toward your goal, but don't be discouraged - never give up! With my help, you can overcome any obstacle. Do not expect an easy path as you journey hand in hand with Me, but do remember that I, your very -present Helper, am omnipotent.
Much, much stress results from your wanting to make things happen before their times have come. One of the main ways I assert My sovereignty is in the timing of events. If you want to stay close to Me and do things My way, ask Me to show you the path forward moment by moment. Instead of dashing headlong toward your goal, let Me set the pace. Slow down, and enjoy the journey in My presence.

It was amazing how God had prepared my heart with those words before I was even aware of the unsettling news we would receive a couple of hours later. I had to hold on to these words and keep them in my heart as we continued through an emotional week. We felt God's presence with us as He provided just the right friends and family to encourage us at just the right times through our emotional ups and downs of that week. I was also encouraged by some words spoken by my very wise bible study fellowship teaching leader. She spoke right to my heart when she said.......

God's way of leading is step by step. Very rarely does God give us the whole picture. Following God in the dark requires faith. We aren't going to be able to figure it out all on our won. When God closes a door we are to thank Him and when he opens a door we are to follow and trust Him. Take one step at a time. There is a next step.

Isaiah 30:21 has also brought me great comfort over the past two weeks........Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way; walk in it."

We haven't received our January number yet, but I think we are 15.

October Number

We have gone from 37 in June to 30 in July to 27 in July to 21 in September to 20 in October. So we are moving on up!! We are beyond ready to get that referral call. I keep imagining what that day will be like.

I was about to get on a plane to Houston when we got our October number. I knew it was coming anytime and I kept checking my email over and over because I really wanted to find out before I got on the plane. I did find out just in time and my heart sank when I saw that we had only moved one spot. I immediately felt weak. It was as if all the strength was zapped from me. I took a deep breath, said a prayer, and got on the plane. Let me just say that I love how God works! He knew exactly what I needed during that plane trip because when I opened my BSF lesson, the very first day was about Paul's personal suffering in his journeys. I have always loved reading about Paul and we can learn so much from his attitudes towards suffering. While I am not experiencing physical suffering, I definitely have moments of complete weakness. In 2nd Corinthians 12:7 Paul pleaded for his torment to be taken away. The Lord responded by saying, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

There are so many times when we feel weak through this process, but when we call on Christ and remain obedient to His call through this journey we are strong again. I have actually learned to delight in my weakness because just as Paul says in 2nd Corinthians 12:10, "For when I am weak, I am strong." If I didn't experience such weakness, I wouldn't experience strength from Christ, and I wouldn't want to miss that.

AGCI picnic and new number

At a picnic with families from All God's Children adoption agency that have adopted children.
We are officially #37 on the girls list for June!

I was very disappointed that I never posted our May number (which was 37), so when we got our June number I had to laugh (or else I would have cried) because it was 37! That is right, we had no movement from May to June. We have officially been on the waiting list for over 9 months now which means our child is overdue!! At least that is how we feel. The adoption process is definitely a roller coaster ride emotionally. Some days we feel like it will never happen, and some days we feel that it will happen anytime. I know it sounds trite, but the only way we are holding on through this is knowing that God's timing for our adoption will be revealed at the perfect time. We truly believe that with all of our hearts!

We had the opportunity to attend a picnic put on by our agency. It was held in Cincinnati and we were able to stop by on our way down to our vacation. We couldn't stay long because we had tickets to the Grand Ole Opry that night, but it was wonderful to connect with other adoptive families and receive support and encouragement from them. I loved seeing all of the sweet children and seeing them with their families gave me the boost of encouragement that I needed. We were also able to meet one of our former case managers who had flown in from Portland. I loved getting to talk with her and put a face to the voice I had talked to so much on the phone. It is our great hope that next year we will be able to attend the picnic with our new little one!

Relying on Hope

As of early April (yes, I am a month behind!) we are currently #42 on the girls list. Over the past month there have been days when I feel like we are going to get that referral anytime (because of our parameters we most likely won't have to wait to get to that #1 spot) and then there are days when I feel like it is never going to happen. So when I feel discouraged I rely on the hope we have had all along. I know God is faithful and I know God keeps his promises. In my study of Isaiah I came across this verse which gave me a renewed sense of hope. I also read it as I was looking out my window watching the leaves bud and flowers bloom. It is Isaiah 61:11 - For as the soil makes the sprout come up and a garden causes seeds to grow, so the Sovereign Lord will make righteousness and praise spring up before all nations. The context of the scripture is God bringing hope to the people of Israel as he promises to restore their land. It certainly brought hope to me this month.

Movement in the midst of uncertainty

Needless to say this month has been one filled with a lot of emotional ups and downs. When we first heard the news that MOWA (Ministry of Women's Affairs) in Ethiopia was going to drastically reduce the number of adoptions processed, by perhaps 90 percent, we knew that it could now be years before we bring our daughter home. We took a deep breath, didn't panic and prayed like crazy. Thankfully, our agency, All God's Children International, has done such a wonderful job of keeping us updated and informed that we didn't feel like we were left in the dark for very long. There is still uncertainly as to how events will unfold over the next few months, but we are staying faithful and are filled with hope. For the latest updates, you can visit http://www.adoption.state.gov/ or http://www.jointcouncil.org/ The USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) will facilitate a meeting in Washington D.C. on April 6th regarding Ethiopian adoptions and are allowing adoptive families to call in. Hopefully I won't be working that day and will be able to participate. Of course, we are praying over what these potential changes might mean for our family, but, above all we are in constant prayer that the decisions made by the government serve the best interests of the children and families in Ethiopia.

Brooke has put herself in charge of designing our new numbers and this month she wanted me to make the number out of shamrocks. I hope that drawing a few shamrocks on the number will suffice! We are happy to be moving up the list and are now 47th on the girls list. Our parameters are 20-54 months. We can't wait to meet her!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Creeping slowly along

We received our new number the first week of February. We now hold the #58 spot. Brooke formed the number out of candy Valentine hearts. For some reason I had been counting on January being a big month for movement, but that wasn't the case. We were disappointed at first, but it amazing how peaceful we do still feel regardless of how slowly things are moving. There is a song that keeps playing over and over in my head. It is "While I'm Waiting" by John Waller. The lyrics are so perfect and sums up how we are managing the wait.

I am waiting......I'm waiting on You, Lord.....And I'm hopeful......I'm waiting on You, Lord

Though it is Painful.....But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead, bold and confident....taking every step in obedience...While I'm waiting I will serve you....While I'm waiting I will worship...While I am waiting....I will not faint....I'll be running the race even as I wait.

I'm waiting....I'm waiting on You, Lord...And I am peaceful....I'm waiting on You, Lord....Though it is not easy....But faithfully, I will wait....Yes, I will wait...I will serve you while I am waiting....I will worship while I am waiting.

And that is what we are doing.

Our New Number

As of January 6th we are 60 on the waiting list! We love hearing what our new number is each month and we wait in eager anticipation. The kids and I made the number 60 out of the donut holes I had bought them the morning after we heard our new number. I have a feeling that January will be a big month! Hoping and praying at least!!